Steel Magnolia

I want to be a steel magnolia. That has just always sounded good to me. This is the definition from Urban Dictionary: A southern woman who is strong and independent yet very feminine. I want to be someone who can take it. I want to be considered strong. I think that is Western society's influence on me. And then there's the movie with Julia Roberts which was filmed in Natchitoches, LA. And I HAVE taken the tour!

And then I think... let me take a look at this again. I need to be myself. That is what I have discovered this whole journey has been about. I need to be who I authentically was born, how God made me. The "supposed tos" and "shoulds" are falling by the wayside bit by slow bit. I am changing the way my thoughts have always been.

I need to take care of myself so that I can take care of the rest of my family, especially now with GaGa's illness hanging over us. That has been the message the last 3 weeks. Maybe I need to take a break for a few hours and get away. What is this strong, tough business? Strong and tough don't make one empathetic and loving. That's who I really strive to be, that is who I really want to be. Holy cow, that is who I am.

I need to be who I am and then everything will feel right in my soul, no matter what is going on around me. I am tough, and I am tender. I am emotional. I am strong. And some days I have nice hair if I take the time.