This is the start of my third year of writing a blog. The first year I wrote 71 entries, so I just cheated and finished a draft to make it the same number for 2010. When I read the earliest entries, all I can think is that I've come a long way baby and I'm still going. I ponder if I should be putting all of my "business" out there but it just feels right. Not just right but freaking cathartic. I didn't even know I didn't have a voice before so letting it out, feels really good.
I have had so many subtle aha moments over the last few years and that is what I understand therapy is all about. Changing the way my mind was trained to think and opening it up to another world view. Slow and steady wins the race, but now I know it's not a race. The lightbulb moments just keep coming and I am thankful. This journey to figure out who I authentically am has been painful, eye opening, cathartic and in the end I realize it is all about love. The love that I am learning to give to myself in the form of self care. AND once you learn how to take care of yourself, you are so much more open to giving to others.
I came across a "Soul Series" radio show about spirituality and therapy. The counseling profession has long wanted to keep counseling and spirituality separate but now they must be starting to merge. As I am finally appreciating myself for who I am and loving what is, God and his awesomeness and availibility is being revealed. We are born into this world with infinite love and possibilities and then parents and the environment take over. It is my job now to take over and relearn love and possibilities.
I know that this track of personal awareness is not for everyone but I KNOW it is for me. I am finally putting the pieces together and understanding what life is all about for me now.