He Failed the Job Interview for the Highest Court in the Land

On Thursday, a very compelling, articulate, credible woman told her truth of a sexual assault naming her attacker.  Dr. Christine Blasey Ford does not remember exact details, like how she got home when she was running for her life.  Victims of assault don't remember because there has been TRAUMA.  Trauma changes everything. But she absolutely remembers the person(s) who physically assaulted her in the room and the man who held his hand over her mouth removing her ability to breathe.  The sounds of Mark Judge and Brett Kavanaugh's laughter is forever burned in her memory.  Her life has been affected for the last 37 years.

Thirty Seven Years.

Sexual Assault survivors are affected for the rest of their lives.

How many women don't come forward because they are shamed, scared and know they will not be believed?  After the President, who has been accused of sexual assault himself, said it was Dr. Ford's fault for not coming forward when she was fifteen, survivors who have never previously uttered a word to anyone, spoke of their painful stories en masse.  Yet even when women do the bravest thing possible, it just doesn't matter. It comes down to a "he said, she said." The old white men side with the other man.  The statistics are sad and dismal.  Women do not come forward.  Cases do not go to trial and there are not convictions. Rape kits sit untested. There are not usually witnesses to assaults.  And the assaulters get away with their behavior.

The hearing on Thursday was a "he said, she said" without any other witnesses allowed.  She was very credible. He was angry, condescending, and evasive.  So what is the answer? Old white men apologize to the entitled white man and vote him in.  They ignore her truth and are astonished and moved at his emotion.  But his emotion was from being found out and letting his family down. And the white male senators couldn't handle one of themselves crying. "The Democrats broke this man."

No, Kavanaugh broke himself.

Most men and even women, especially these male Senators, don't know how to recognize emotional behaviors in front of their eyes.  They run from anything vulnerable.  They recognize and adulate power.

It is sad that he feels so entitled, that he came out swinging for a lifetime spot on the most dignified and important bench in the United States.  He is no longer qualified because he failed his job interview.  He was playing to a jury of one who appreciates bold and brash denials.  Roy Cohn, the McCarthy lawyer taught that one man jury how to do it so well.

It is time for the old white men's club to be dismantled.

I wish I were one to get out there and march and speak up.  But my calling is to write. Perhaps because I live in the Deep South Bible Belt and it was ingrained in me by the culture to smile, be pretty and stay quiet. This is my own personal quiet revolution.  Writing these words are a coming out in the midst of a deeply red state with very small blue spots in cities.  My senators are the worst. One gives quotable shticky one liners and the other writes articles for mysogynistic, racist websites.

I identified with Dr. Ford sitting in that interview.  She was bright, articulate and funny.  When she began speaking about the assault, she became the fifteen year old girl again.  That is what trauma does to one.  But she knew who attacked her.

Judge Kavanaugh was on a high pressure job interview for a seat on the highest bench in the land.  When he began speaking it was belligerent, partisan, entitled and condescending.  This is not how a judge should comport himself or herself and shows his true character.  Assault charges aside, he is not the best candidate for the job because of how he behaved Thursday.   What his actions revealed was a white man who has always had privilege and could not believe that he was being called out.  He was crying because he got caught.  From his actions under oath, it is entirely believable that he could act aggressive and violently when alcohol enters his bloodstream.

He must have been the shy kid who drank excessively and wasn't having sex but wanted to. He was conflicted about a natural desire and what was dictated by his religious culture.  There seem to be several classmates coming forward to reveal he was a nasty drunk and not exactly the do gooder that he wants the world to believe. None of us are good as we want ourselves to be but don't fib about it under oath.

Kavanaugh is not the best person for this job to legislate women's issues for the next thirty to forty years.  Nominate another candidate. Push that candidate through before the midterms.

It is unfortunate that Dr. Ford's story was leaked when she wasn't ready.  It is unfortunate that the other accusers came forward at the last minute of an arbitrary deadline.  For survivors, there is strength in numbers.   But the allegations have been brought out, and now Senators have to deal with it and follow tradition of due process and not throw hissy fits about it.  Senator Graham doesn't want to know the truth. Did he watch her testimony?  Thank goodness Senator Flake got caught in that elevator with a brave survivor speaking her truth.  And now there is one week for the FBI to gather more information. One week only was given for a lifetime appointment.

In the hearing, Judge Kavanaugh over and over refused to say out loud, let the FBI clear my name.  He kept repeating, I'll do what the committee says.  Because he knew the Majority on the committee was behind him.  He doesn't want further digging.  Why?  He absolutely doesn't want Mark Judge to testify.  He knows he drank too much at times and something in him deep inside, that he's not ready to admit yet, doesn't know what happened every time.   Kavanaugh lied about several facts including Renate, the triangle, and boofing, or whatever it was. There are other lies related to judicial matters.  Instead of answering the blackout drinking question, he made a turn to aggressively ask the kind and seemingly meek female Senator Klobuchar if she had the alcohol problem.   This is what a defensive, guilty aggressive person does.  He is trying to paint himself as the victim when Dr. Ford's life has been affected for the last thirty seven years.  People at that particular gathering where the assault took place may not know anything because she ran away and didn't tell anyone as survivors do, but there are people that could testify to a pattern of his behavior, mental health professionals that would explain her memory gaps, lie detector results for both of them and character witnesses on both sides. And then there are the other accusers.

We are at a place today, where getting the facts still may not make a difference because of the makeup of the Senate.

The Senate Judiciary Majority are completely ignoring the other accusers that have come forward because they don't want to know anymore and they want to push this nomination through. (Merrick Garland, anyone?)   Those accusers are willing to testify under oath to the FBI, the non-partisan information gathering body.  Kavanaugh doesn't, but why?  He just kept repeating, "I was ready to show up the next day to clear my name."  The next day would not give any time for an investigation.  How does a Federal Judge not understand that concept?

Courtesy of Megamamas

When people are found out, they do lie to save themselves. Our President is one of those who lies every day, day in and day out.  He has no credibility whatsoever in this matter.  He calls all his accusers liars.  And he was found out to be lying about Stormy Daniels per his own lawyer.  Judge Kavanaugh has proven to be on the same page as the partisan pussy grabber in chief to double down and repeat a lie until it seems it's the truth.  Judge Kavanaugh defended himself in a brash, aggressive manner maybe because that's who he really is or for Trump so that he would remain the nominee.   There is no doubt he and his family has suffered in the last 2 weeks, (contrast that with 37 years) but when you want to sit on the most respected, highest court in the land for the next thirty to forty years, the candidate must be thoroughly investigated even when new allegations come at the very last moment. 

Sexual assault victims do not come forward.

Dr. Ford showed more character, bravery and composure after a lifetime of suffering.  She did her civic duty.  She's reliving her worst trauma in front of the nation but she didn't whine and complain like Dr. Kavanaugh.  Women can be Steel Magnolias.  Judge Kavanaugh is having to come to grips with his past too.  Perhaps he could have come clean and said, I don't remember what happened when I drank too much, it is possible but I don't know.  I am a changed man now.

Those are pipe dreams I know.  But one day in the future.

There were witnesses to his past and I hope we find out more of the truth. I don't count on it because I have equal parts pessimism and optimism in me.

I do know, he failed the job interview.

I hope beyond all hope, that there is a wave of qualified women and minorities coming forth to lead and dismantle the old boys club.  Women came forward after Anita Hill and ran for office in record numbers.  It is accepted that what Dr. Hill said back then was true about Judge Thomas and she was maligned in the process.  And some of the same men back then are still judging now.   What will we know about this particular assault in the future?  What truths will come out over time?

History Will Not Be Kind to Trump: Do You See What I See?

I wasn't going to write anything about Trump until I could reach beyond a reactionary response to his divisiveness and black and white thinking.  


But you know, I have to start where I am, as an observer with a counselor background and a keen interest in the American Presidency and history.  I have to process what I see.  And I have seen a lot as have you. 

Do you see what I see?

A friend recently pointed out that President Trump meets every one of the criteria for a Sociopath.    Here are the criteria for a high functioning sociopath:  

High IQ: High functioning sociopaths often have a higher IQ than other sociopaths or people without personality disorders. This helps them plan, manipulate, and exploit others.

Lack of empathy: Difficulty is empathizing with others or understanding the emotional consequences of their actions.

Narcissism: They often have strong self-love and grandiose self-image. This occurs because of low esteem and delusional beliefs.

Charming: Although most sociopaths lack empathy, they are capable of mimicking and manipulating emotions to appear charming and normal

Secretive: A sociopath doesn't feel the need to share intimate details with others unless it is to manipulate.  (Tax returns & business dealings after American banks stopped loaning him $)

Sexually deviant: Since they lack guilt, remorse, and emotional attachments, sociopaths tend to have affairs and engage in the questionable sexual activity. (Goes Without Saying) 

Sensitive to criticism: Despite their lack of empathy, sociopaths desire the approval of others. They feel entitled to admiration and are quick to anger when criticized.

Impulsive behavior: Sociopaths often live in the moment and will do what they feel is needed to reach their immediate goals. (Twitter rants and policy) 

Compulsive lying: Disregarding the truth to make themselves look better or get what they want.
Needing constant stimulation: Sociopaths often get bored easily and need to be actively engaged.

Addictive Behavior: Their compulsive mindset may result in addiction to drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, or other addictive behaviors. (Twitter, controlling the narrative) 

Criminal Behavior: Criminal activity associated with sociopaths could include theft, assault, or destruction of property. (Got In trouble in high school and was sent to military school, and you know, waiting patiently for Mueller)

Isn't it amazing how he meets EVERY SINGLE CRITERIA? Although sociopath is not a DSM diagnosis, it parallels very closely to anti-social disorder which is.  He does meet the criteria for Narcissistic Personality too. 

Why does it matter that this label fits?   On a daily basis we see each of these characteristics playing out in destructive ways in our country in hourly breaking news.  Let's begin with the lies.  As of last month, three thousands lies in the last 466 days.  Every politician glosses the truth, but Trump has hit the high of six lies per day, and ones that are easily proven false, yet his followers believe them.  His supporters at the recent Duluth rally were interviewed and believe that the pictures at the border detention center supplied by Trump's own administration are not real.   

It's not only lying, but the constant gaslighting of the American people when things are not going well for him.  As the Russian investigation gets closer and closer to him, he acts out and distracts. This is his brand management style of a reality TV Show Presidency.  When the noose tightens, distract. He changes the narrative and he's exquisitely pathologically good at this. For example, he first began saying there was no Russian collusion which in and of itself is not illegal, but as communication by his team with Russian emissaries was revealed over and over, he began the pivot as did Nixon, that the investigation by his own appointed Justice Department is flawed and conspiracy theories abound. 

This Russian witch hunt currently has 17 indictments, 5 guilty pleas, and one campaign manager currently behind bars because he couldn't stop criminal behavior even with an ankle cuff monitor.  

He will hire only the best people.  





The Russian investigation began not because of a conspiratorial "deep state" but because his own foreign policy adviser, George Papadopoulos, bragged to Australia's British diplomat in a London bar that Russia had dirt on Hilary Clinton.  

He hires only the best people. 

Australian intelligence counterparts then notified our intelligence offices. That is the way ally Intelligence offices work. U.S. Intelligence doesn't work for the benefit of just one narcissistic U.S. President, they work for the safety of the entire country. 

One or two of his very best people happened to already work as pro-Russian agents for countries like the Ukraine and they accidentally forgot to put that on their official work papers and lied to the FBI about it. 

He hires only the best people. 

Back to the sociopathic tendencies.  What matters to him is attention, optics and ratings and most importantly trying to fill a void of self worth that will never be quenched.   

Trump genuinely reveres and envies dictators. He believes if he had their absolute power, he wouldn't feel so empty and persecuted -- but he is wrong. Nothing will ever fill his infinite sense of emptiness.

— Tony Schwartz (@tonyschwartz) June 16, 2018

 

Tony Schwartz is the writer of  "The Art of the Deal," who spent eighteen months daily with Trump. (He massively regrets his role in the writing of this book and creating the persona.)

The real problem, is he doesn't appear to have a soul.  An August 2016 quote about Trump from recently departed Conservative columnist Charles Krauthammer: "He has a shocking absence of elementary decency and of natural empathy for the most profound of human sorrows, parental grief." 

It's hard to watch our democracy being lead by someone who has no empathy, decency and actively stokes division at every turn. It's a true test of our founding father's framework.   In order to watch the news, I have to balance it and listen to historical scholars who say that our founding fathers envisioned this and our democracy will survive. Jon Meacham is one of them. 

Other than the test of our democracy, the reason I'm so intrigued is that I was fooled too.  I never liked Trump because he was too narcissistic, too sexist and too much.  But I actually thought he could possibly be a legit business person. I was fooled by the gold letters on top of some of his buildings until I learned that those are a licensing facade.  He doesn't own the buildings but rather the right to put his name on it.  He's pathologically good at branding. 

But then I learned the details of his business career: dad's money, bankruptcies, lawsuits, cheating small business owners, failed businesses including Atlantic casinos, which led to American banks no longer loaning him money.  Where did he go for funding to stay afloat? Russian oligarchs and anywhere money could be hidden.  You don't play with dirty money and come out clean.  This is why there is no transparency with his tax returns.   Why does one need a fixer like Michael Cohen if you are running your businesses above board?

His business evolved to reality TV.  And our TV President held court in The Apprentice and that facade made him legitimate to some citizens.  He presided in the big chair on a television set that gave the appearance of a strong businessman who said, "You're Fired" but it was... scripted and directed.   In reality, he cannot handle conflict, and has other people fire whomever has crossed him or he sits behind his unsecured phone and fires by Twitter.  

What blew me away was, with his much touted negotiating skills, and with a Republican House and Senate, he couldn't get his version of healthcare passed because he had no version.  He doesn't read, he doesn't know policy or history,  just catch phrases.  It was truly shocking to me what a poor negotiator he actually is.  He's really good at executive orders in front of the camera though.  He can't roll up his sleeves and do the hard work even though he might have a good point.  (See, I give him that he might have some good instincts!)  He's unable to have the hard conversation with our ally leaders in person to reach a mutually beneficial agreement at a summit. That is what negotiating is about.  That is strength.  

It's sad to see it's about optics and show.   He only shows up for the picture op or a parade in his honor.

Whatever you have to say about Obama and your disagreement with his policies, he met with both parties, had meetings and had hard negotiations to pass healthcare.   He is a Christian, he said Merry Christmas and he was born in Hawaii.  Even though it would be okay if he were Muslim because being Muslim does not mean you are a terrorist.  He sat with parents who had lost grade school children to gun violence and wept with them.  Trump does not have that emotional capability.  He threw paper towel rolls in Puerto Rico from behind a table and it was so symbolic of who he is.  Of course, that U.S. territory is still suffering. 

All of the above mentioned sociopathic tendencies are crippling him and has an affect on our country. 

Most recently, the lack of empathy was on full display with his Zero Tolerance family separation border policy which Stephen Miller crafted and Attorney General Sessions stamped.  He started the fire and then put the fire out.   For a day or so, he did see an opportunity to use these terrorized detained immigrant children as hostages for leverage for his wall but then optics got too bad for him.   He has affected children and families who have been so psychologically scarred and whom may never be reunited with their parents.  As of this morning, he drops Immigration impulsively because the optics are bad at the present moment. 

Then people brought little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples rebuked them. Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

I can't even begin with Sessions using the Bible to justify ripping families apart, just like it  was used to support slavery.  At times I actually feel sorry for Sessions whose policies I deplore. He is Trump's whipping boy because he actually did the ethical action of stepping down from overseeing an investigation that included himself.  But Trump is now torturing him unmercifully because mafioso Don was expecting loyalty from "his" man.  (Trump was expecting a Roy Cohn)  Trump's authoritarian stances and dictator love is quite disconcerting.  It wasn't a joke that he wanted "his" people to stand at attention like Kim Jong Un's people as rocket man presides over a murderous military regime. 

He has extreme black and white thinking. (I spot it, I got it too!) You are either all in or on the complete outs with Trump.  For example, he is incapable of nuances.  He doesn't know how to meet Kim Jong Un and not flatter and fawn all over a murderous dictator.  He could meet with him, be courteous and yet hold a hard line.  I thought the two of them might just be so crazy that something good could come of it.  

Then there is the inconsistency of the "law and order" President.  He is waging Presidential war against his own Justice department to cover his own tracks.   Why would someone with so many questionable financial dealings with funding from dirty money run for the highest office in the land?  He brought this level of investigation on himself.  His narcissism tells him he can get away with it.  And Comey helped him win the Presidency!!  I am not missing that irony. 

A simple fact during the campaign was he told the American people he had no dealings with Russia and all along, his business associates were trying to build a Trump Tower there.  He learned to lie this masterfully from Joe McCarthy's lawyer, Roy Cohn when Trump was thirty years old.  He learned  how to double down and repeatedly lie until people think it's the truth.  

This is wearing me out, how about you? 

Who is the Biggest Fake?  

I know many do see the dysfunctional sociopathic characteristics but they see it as strength.  They have craved someone who calls it like they see it.  He's bold, he doesn't care about political correctness.  America First!!    Mixed in with America First are the evangelical leaders and Christians who align with the man who says he has makes no mistakes and never needs to be forgiven.  And well, the sociopathic tendencies...

Jesus would have been all in for America First, right?  Jesus, the olive skinned Jew, who was an immigrant with no home who preached "love thy neighbor as thyself."

Jesus would have been turned away at the border by our current administration.  He was a snowflake in the best way, who said love everyone.   My personal God is the God of all people in the world, not just the American ones.  Trump has co-opted patriotism for his own purposes.  I love America, I love our freedom but I also see that the rest of the world's children (and adults) as God's too.  This includes the brown ones, the Mexican ones, the Muslim ones, females, children, gay, straight, transgender, the tax collector, the Pharisee, the white ones and the male ones. 

My pastor says that we must love our enemies.  I think Jesus did too.  Trump may stoke the fire of divisiveness and indecency day in and day out but I really try not to respond in hate.  I can even tell you how he has helped me!  Trump has helped me accept that I am not in control.  Ha ha!!   And that is an understatement!!  He has taught me to be in the present moment, more than Eckhart Tolle, Deepak Chopra or Jesus could! He has helped me to understand that politics are so very personal and they are so very deeply ingrained.  Do I hate Trump?  He makes me cringe for sure.  I can't listen to him speak and I loathe red hats. I really despise his actions and his rhetoric but I do try to understand him.  That is who I am.  I try to understand who he is and who his followers are.  I think he's pretty miserable that he won.  

For those who understand what I'm writing intimately, take heart.  I truly believe our democracy will survive this President.  Now, I don't think that every day, but on my best day, I do.  It will be ugly for a while still.  The Founding Fathers created our constitutional framework because we were fleeing a King with unlimited power and forced religion. They had this scenario in mind. 

Do you see what I see?

If you don't agree with any of these thoughts, thanks for reading all the way to the bottom!!  We may not see the same things, but I do try to see you, and understand as well.  We both want many of the same things in life, we just have different ways of getting there. 

Namaste. 

But Really Who Should Be Fired?

Trumps latest tirade while at an Alabama campaign rally*, is aimed at NFL athletes, the sons of bitches*, who take a knee and should be fired.

But really who should be fired?

I guess NFL players with their peaceful knee protests are not nice people, whereas neo-nazis and white supremacists marching under the cover of night, with KKK like torches, chanting "blood and soil", and "Jews will not replace us" and inciting incredible fear in Charlottesville are nice people.

One group wants to exterminate persons not like them and harken back to a time where millions were murdered, while the other is exercising a first amendment right to shine a light on injustice.  Wars were fought, soldiers have died for this right, and for our democratic values.  They are risking their livelihoods for the arc of justice.  Martin Luther King and many others died for equality and  did so by peaceful protesting.  Kaepernick lost his job, so if you side with Trump that can make you happy.

This is the main issue: what is more important, the flag/anthem, or the people and the constitution whom it represents?  The flesh and blood of humans who die because of the color of their skin or are incarcerated at an alarmingly disproportionate rate?  Protesting has been what has brought needed change and justice and there is more work to do.

"For the land of the free and the home of the brave."  Or does that mean, just those with white skin.

These are not black and white issues. One can be for police and for Black Lives Matter at the same time.  This is called both/and. It is an evolved way of thinking. You can Back the Blue and want to weed out those who don't follow the very laws they are enforcing.  There is systematic institutional racism that needs to be addressed and there are no easy answers.  Evidently peaceful protesting and 45's discomfort with free speech has gotten our attention.

But really who should be fired?

Forty-five's comments show what he is really worried about as he does in his tweets. His poor self-image and ego comes out against other people when it is really about himself and his weaknesses. The Russian chokehold is getting closer and closer to him and those around him.    Trump is going to be more aggressively acting out to divert attention.  If there is nothing to hide, then let the Russian investigation move forward without any more obstruction.  Mueller has been lauded on both sides of the aisle as the straightest of shooters with impeccable integrity and credentials.

You can't say that about Trump, but I digress.

So far the actions, allegedly, of 45 and/or his team are:  his campaign team did meet with a Kremlin linked Russian lawyer with the enticement of getting dirt on an opponent (collusion), 45 helped draft the statement to lie about said meeting(obstruction),  Manafort offered campaign information to a Russian oligarch in Putin's inner circle (collusion, treason?),  Trump fired the FBI director because he was investigating him (obstruction of justice),  Flynn was working for other countries best interest's and didn't report it (treason?), the multitude of lies and lack of transparency such as lying a about revealing the Trump/ Russia business overtures during the campaign and then there is the emoluments clause. That is so far on the back burner but one area that needs attention. These are the incredible damning issues that Trump has created, right off the top of my head.  And that is not touching business deals of Trump and Russian oligarchs, the Steele Dossier, how to handle nuclear threats, and just plain moral deficits. Thank goodness for the free press.

Who really should be fired? 

It is very telling that 45 can forcefully and passionately admonish NFL peaceful protestors, but has never had one, not one harsh word for a hostile foreign power who tried in various ways to undermine our democratic election. It is an act of war and he doesn't care.  He does nothing about it but deny it and degrade our Intelligence agencies, because his ego can't handle that the legitimacy of the election is in question and/or was he colluding?  The truth will come out eventually.

He's so worried about himself that our democracy is left hanging because he doesn't want to get to the bottom of it, to work to prevent it again or stop it as it is ongoing.

And he is our President.

Who really should be fired?

Not speaking out is not an option any more.

 *(and can we talk about the constant need for  campaign rallies in the first year of office to stroke his ego) (and that a President is using this language)

(And I didn't even address the issue of him wanting more violence in a game that is already deadly to it's players and their brains.)

With a very deep breath, I end with my customary 
Namaste.
(the divine in me bows to the divine in you)

The Lesson of a Donald Trump Presidency

I have started many post election missives.  And I write and I get worked up and angry and that is not the place I want to come from and I don't finish them.  I'm really going to try to finish in the spirit that it is intended today.  But that spirit is being lost as events and facts continue to unfold and it's even more disheartening.  What is going on is not about politics as usual whatsoever.

I see and hear the frustration on all sides.  The frustration that led unemployed workers in Erie, PA to vote for Trump out of desperation even though they wished he would stop talking a certain way.  Coal miners need jobs yet they are benefiting from ACA and don't think he will really dismantle it.  (How does one choose which thing to believe of what he says? )  I understand those who want change and there was too much progress to handle.  Two months ago, I was stunned but understood those reasons why he was elected.  But now, it's a different story.  There is Russian involvement and that unfolds each day, and Comey and FBI interference.

There is also no transparency of any sort with the businesses that PEOTUS and his family hold, just his word is given to us.  And Kellyanne Conway says not to listen to his words but know his heart.  The heart who degrades anybody who disagrees with him, openly mocked a disabled reporter and grabs pussy because he can.

In the words of the Kentwood native, Oops, I did it again,  I started going off.  Deep breath. Each time I write it boils down to this, the most important occurrence from Nov 8th was...

Decency died.

Do I have to list the reasons why?  If you are reading this, then not likely.

The list is long and there are new reasons each and every day.

Does he really care about Americans?  Or did he just want to WIN!  Did he want retaliation from Obama humiliating him at the 2011 White House Correspondence dinner?  The lesson that his father taught him was all about winning and not being a loser.

This notion of winning really goes deep with a painful tragedy within his family. His father, Fred, Sr. and Donald repeatedly told his brother, Fred Jr, who was eight years older than Donald, that he was a loser because he did not have that killer instinct for the family business.  Fred wanted to be a pilot, and he did become a pilot but was a real disappointment to those two men.  Fred Jr. drank himself to death by the age of 43.  I'm sure that instilled in Donald even further to be a winner, or what he designates as a winner.   He is still seeking approval from his deceased father and from all of us around him.  That is his low self worth on display.  (It takes one to know one, I spot it because I got it!)

This next fact, explained so much of Trump's behavior to me and in particular, behavior that is so intolerable to me.  Roy Cohn, the deceased mob and McCarthy era lawyer, taught him to lie and keep repeating lies until people think it's the truth.  Even today when there is audio or video footage to the contrary, this seems to make no difference at all.  Student Trump did finally learn a lesson and he learned it really well.  Truth and facts do not matter.  Double down.

He has not stepped up into being more Presidential as I meagerly hoped, that is not who he is.  He has tweeted in retaliation throughout the transition, the business elite have been appointed for cabinet positions some of whom don't even know the job they are being assigned or are terribly unqualified, and there is no untangling himself from his businesses.  The potential for conflict of interest is huge.  The first Trump White House Press Briefing by Sean Spicer included an infomercial for his DC hotel.  

He has historically low poll numbers of any President before he is sworn in at 40%.

I am not alone in thinking this man is not ready for the job.

But he was elected and with unprecedented foreign involvement.  Yet, there is a peaceful transition of power.  And then what will happen next?

I read an article in Psychology Today by Karl Albrecht, PhD that described who Trump will be as a President.  It fits with everything that I've read and watched of who he is.  There won't be meetings or information shared by those with knowledgable of the given area because he doesn't have the patience or attention span for that.  His style of leadership will be a fly by the seat of his pants and a competition of those around him who can get his attention the longest and compete for their interests.

A concern that stands out to me is that when a tragic event like the Sandy Hook massacre occurs, can you imagine PEOTUS comforting the families or the United States as a whole?  His thin skin and ego, is all about himself.  Does he know how to be empathetic?

Is he going to grow up?  Is he going to learn, that not everything is about himself?

Now that I've gotten a little bit out of my system, I will attempt to take a different turn.

I do think that with this election, there has been a positive.  He has galvanized those who disagree with him in solidarity!  The marches of women and others demonstrating are going to be amazing. His words, "Nasty Woman" were a rallying call. There is activism out the wazoo to let Senators and Representatives know what their constituents want.  There was a huge response to Republicans trying to gut an ethics panel at the beginning of the month.  I have taken to several different means to communicate with my representatives.  These people in government work for us and we are not going to let them forgot that.

I have to speak up and that is not comfortable for me at all.

But in the words of Pastor Martin Niemöller: I saw these words this summer in Boston at a Holocaust memorial.

First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Socialist.
Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Trade Unionist.
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.


My hope and prayer is that Trump can continue to be an agent of change, just not for what his intentions are, whatever they are.  I have to pray for this man and for those who surround him.  This is a tall order.   I can easily pray for life, liberty and the pursuit of justice for all people of the United States.  All people including those of different skin colors and races, different religions, women, those with disabilities and of different sexual orientations, all of us.  We are all brothers and sisters.  We are all in this together. A divine power created us all.  Now to actually send positive thoughts to someone whom I have seen no decency in? That is how I have to grow.

I pray that as he takes on the awesome responsibility of this job, it transforms him.  One can hope.

The only way that I know to move forward is to love.   I have to love and care for those around me, including myself.   Even though decency died, I have to love those whom I disagree with politically and move forward.  I have to dig really, really deep.  Because that lack of decency is born out of fear.  Fear of not having a job again, fear of the color of the United States changing, fear of a woman leader, and fear of change.  And the opposite of fear is love.  I have to dig really deep to live in peace that all will be well.  This is the ultimate teacher.  Love big even though it is not being demonstrated by the man in the Presidency.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Sending love out.  I will walk my dogs now.  I will work on my budget. I will clean and do laundry and tonight,  I will pick up my kids from school, I will go to my Spiritual Formation conference and listen to the topic of Holy Listening. That is the perfect antidote for today.

Namaste

So Trump is the Presumptive Nominee...and Why Mindfulness Matters

Donald Trump is the presumptive nominee for President for the Republican party.

The Republican party has imploded.

Wow.

My small self, with a small s, (my ego) is repulsed by this.  The nomination not the implosion.

And for all of the same reasons so many people are also completely and utterly turned off by him: bigotry, racism, misogyny, inciting violence and hatred, making fun of the disabled and the list goes on and on and on.  His ego is soft, and he cannot handle criticism or opposing views.  He attacks his "opponent" viciously with superficial arguments like gender or physical attributes, not the issue at hand.  He is like a toddler.  It is his way or the highway.  This is the level of emotional maturity that he is working under.

He is the textbook definition of a narcissist.

And a portion of the population is voting for him in droves.

And this is America.  It is a democracy.  And this is our process!

I can have my opinion and vote and you can too.

How will his temperament serve our country in foreign matters? His anti-Muslim rhetoric and big talk of bombing ISIS only makes their job of recruitment easier.  He plays into their hands.

This isn't an episode of Celebrity Apprentice or Miss USA.  The U.S. has to get along with the rest of the world.   Nothing about Trump says that he can be diplomatic. Nothing.

His presence in the race has provided hours of ratings for the media and entertainment for the masses but it has been cringeworthy every step of the way.  EVERY step of the way. 

I never liked him as an entertainer, because who he is as a person showed through.  He IS a child of God, as we ALL are but his attitude regarding women, is deplorable.  He has no experience in politics.  None.   His record of being a businessman has so many holes in it.  An article in Fortune Magazine, says that he would have billions more if he had just invested what he inherited in index funds rather than all of his failed businesses.  With the bankruptcies that he can't acknowledge, and failed businesses (the defunct Trump University is currently in litigation for false claims and illegal business practices) where is this business acumen the authoritarian voters cling to when asked why he is an attractive candidate?   He is media savvy.  He knows about branding.  The Trump name just appeals to his voters because it says luxury, but some of it is a facade.  He doesn't even own all the buildings that his name is on, he just licenses them to carry his name.  Appearances.

The people who are voting for him really don't know what they are getting themselves into.  He has changed his stance on many issues to appeal to the extreme right which is normal for politicians.  Yet he has no track record to review, to know what the heck he would do in the most powerful position in the world.  He knows what to say, to get a segment of the population riled up.  And most of it, is in three and four word sentence fragments that have no real meaning.

It's not just that he is a Republican and I am firmly on the Democratic side.

It's who he is as a person.  He has no common decency.  It's all about looks.

He makes fun of the "least of these."

It would be embarrassing to have him as our leader.

And with all that said, this is really my point.   This is where the Self with a Big S comes into play for me.   The idea of a Trump presidency is revolting in every way imaginable.   And in the past, this presumptive nomination would have kept me awake at night, and worked up and anxious for days. And for me, that is no way to live.  And mindfulness has gotten me to a place where even if he is elected President, I could accept it.  Acceptance of people, places and things that don't fit with my ideals is terribly hard work but doable.  Life is about acceptance and letting go.  Life is about love.  And I work my way towards that as much as possible.

I don't hate Donald Trump, I just don't agree with him very much, at all.

I would not watch the news. (I don't watch it now though)   I would accept that I have no control over it EXCEPT to vote and contact my Congressman both state and federally.  And I would let it go to a Higher Power.

I'm actually kinda relieved that Trust in the Lord is trending right above It's Donald Trump's Party Now.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) May 4, 2016

Our country has gone through many terrible events and our government is one of checks and balances.  The U.S. would survive.

From a Reuters article in March by Peter Apps:

"For all his rhetoric, a President Trump would, like all other occupants of the Oval Office, find himself constrained by the Constitution, judiciary and Congress. Even if the Republicans do retain control of the House and Senate, many members of Congress are already voicing their opposition. And if a Trump presidency proves as contentious as many expect, it could easily deliver the Democrats control of Congress in 2018."

He would more than likely be a one term President.  That helps my endeavor of mindfulness!!  It would be a test but it could be done. I want to sleep at night. I don't want to worry about politics although they are very important.  In the past, I would have worried excessively.  

I want to engage FULLY  in the people in my life right where I am, as a thoughtful, caring, loving present human being.  I can't do that worrying about who the next President will be.

Mindfulness.  Don't leave home without it.

Namaste.