Whoa.

Last week I went to a beginner yoga class because it fit in the schedule and the teacher complimented me on my alligator pose - one I had never done before. I was quite thrilled. I went again today to a more advanced class that I hadn't been to in a few weeks. As the instructor started, she was warming us up and said feel your bodies, feel what is going on, feel your pain. Then she said, "Embrace your pain!" Whoa. Whoa. It struck me. Instead of fighting the pain, embrace it. She said it is your own pain.

Hmmmm. I remember in the past when I had my back go out or had gotten really sick, like food poisoniing kind of sick, I would fill with fear. Complete angst. How am I going to take care of these kids? That didn't help to move me past the pain, probably intensified it and prolonged it.

And right now, I have a crick in my neck and a little lower back pain. So I'm taking care of myself. I have a routine NOW. Use hot/cold packs, take ibuprofen, take hot baths with epsom salts and stretch. Nurture myself, and accept the pain. I'm really learning to nurture myself and I have needed to for a long time.